Wednesday, September 15, 2010

....why do we love love, when love seems to hate us?

I'm completely over it and over you.

Everyones the same. No matter where I turn I end up with more of the same. No point of running into someone elses arms if they feel the same. I'd rather have no reminder at all that you existed. I'm going to start trusting myself and my ideas from now on. I don't know why I haven't been trusting myself more often than now.
I'm not going to put myself out there anymore, thats so over rated. I'm gonna remain unavailable and unemotional. I do better that way. (SOUND FAMILIAR?!) But I mean it this time. I don't want to be different any more. I want to be same old unavailable me.

When I do my hair, wear more feminine clothes, people say I'm pretty. I'm always me, but when I feel I dress the best, I get no recognition. Respect my individuality and with-hold your accolade's.

I don't want to be in love if I have to go through all the bullshit to get there. I'm just not that interested in having emotional validation. My mother loves me. My father loves me. Why do I need to stand before a gawking audience of doubled-faces and profess my love for another individual. Because this love this is supposed to result in marriage right? I don't think I can stomach the same individual for the rest of my life.

I don't want it.
And you never truly had my heart anyway.
It just sounded good to say.

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